Part 2 of Birth Story (C-Section)

Part 2 of Birth Story (C-Section)

They wheeled us to the operating room. I had the camera with me, I really wasn’t sure what I was to be doing. I had to put on hair net, footies and scrub-shirt. But I was wondering, couldn’t there be germs on my pants that could jump off? Should I keep the camera out and ready, or might there be germs on the camera, cuz I had been carrying it around in my backpack? I hid the camera under my scrub-gown.

The anesthesiologist was cool, I hear they always are. He was happy to be assisting with a C-section, because the other surgery of the night was reattaching some dude’s fingers that he had cut off with a power tool that afternoon, then waited until night to drive in to the hospital to have them looked at. The anesthesiologist said to me, “pretty amazing, huh?” “Yes it is,” I replied, “but I sure am glad I’m a boy.”

For the spinal, they had MBH attempt to hold her knees on her chest…uh…belly in the way, and kept having her arch her back…”no, arch it the other way”. Mean.

It was a few minutes before midnight, there was still a chance Unter & Uber would have different birthdays. They were washing her belly and putting up the curtain. I leaned in close and told her how much I love her, and am proud of her and how fantastic she was doing. (Techniques from childbirth classes, I hoped they worked for C-sections!) She then turned to me and very politely explained she was feeling a little claustrophobic and could I please not be so close to her face. Seriously, she has never been that polite to me. And thinking of it, she was strapped down in crucifix position, the drape was few inches below her chin, and there was an inflatable tube of hot air right under her chin.

Previously I decided that I would not look at the C-section. Sure, very fascinating and educational, but I did not want to experiment with my possible reactions at that time. No need for me to complicate the procedure. They offered me a chance to look at the childrens being born – I declined.

Only five minutes after midnight, our baby daughter Unter was born. Right away she pooped on the doctor and then the room filled with the most beautiful sound. Our baby girl was screaming at the top of her little lungs, (and pooping on the doctor!) We had tears in our eyes. So very loud and apparently unhappy. But it meant that she had healthy lungs.

Next was Uber, only a minute behind his sister. “My he’s big,” said the medical peeps. No screams? I was worried. My wife had a hole in her belly, my son was being quiet, too quiet.

Calmer heads prevailed, and my better half sent me over to our daughter. I went over to her to watch them poking, prodding and other medical stuff. Eventually got the camera out and got a photo of her being weighed. They wrapped her in a little cacoon, and brought her over for MBH to see. Unter was so very light and tiny, and still crying. My wife’s eyes were teary, I could feel myself tearing up a bit, but couldn’t let myself go. Why was my boy being so quiet?

Unter and I went over to check on her brother. A couple of nurses were working on him. I tried to get the camera out, but it was under my gown, and my daughter was in my arms. I didn’t want to put her down, it didn’t seem important enough to ask for help, because the professionals were busy sewing up my wife, or working on my boy. So, no picture of him being weighted. (Sorry son.) I had to be careful walking back to MBH’s head, because I didn’t want to see a surgery in progress.

Soon, everyone was ready to leave the operating room. I tried to say “thank you” to all the people in there that helped out. I felt that “thank you” wasn’t enough, but it was the best I could do.

I don’t remember if I personally carried our daughter to the next stop in our “Four rooms in four hours” hospital tour. See, and this is why I should have been blogging in the OR.

Part 1 of Birth Story

Sometimes, I wanna write perfection about the most important events. Well, I ain’t gonna get perfection, so I’m just gonna put virtual pen to virtual paper, and attempt to tell the Birth Story from my perspective. Links to MyBetterHalf’s (MBH) version of the story are included in the chapter titles.

Part 1 of Birth Story
Monday, June 11th. The work day ended a bit different, I said “see you tomorrow” to my boss. She said, “maybe”, and I said, “No, I’m tired of saying ‘maybe’. Been saying ‘maybe see you tomorrow’ for the past month, I’ll be here in the morning.”

Went up to the hospital, picked up some Thai food and smuggled it in. After a bit, Indecisive Ramblings (IR) showed up, and we shared curry with her, “woo-hoo, curry-fest, hospital-style”!

IR was kind enough to give me a ride home. On the way to the car she asked when I thought the babies would arrive. Using the superior powers of Murphy’s Law, I figured they would show up around 3AM on a day when my cell phone was dead and I was at home. (Previously I predicted they would be born during my Chemistry final on 6/13). About halfway home, I got the call that MBH’s water had broken. Unter & Uber were on the way. I turned to IR and said, “so, how about giving me a ride back to the hospital after I get a change of clothes?”

“I thought that’s what we’d do.”

I inconsiderately didn’t tell my house-guest brother-in-law that U & U were on the way. I said “bye” to the kitties. I grabbed a change of clothes.

Back at the hospital, IR quickly found parking, (and not by disintegrating any cars, either). IR wasn’t sure what to do, just drop me off, or go up to the hospital room with me. I figured, what the heck, come along, we can always kick you out later. She liked this, we went in, and waited 10 minutes to get our temporary security clearance nametags. According to the security dude, IR was now part of our family

In the room, MBH was hooked up to the monitor, the childrens seemed to be doing fine. I was wondering, is this the time to call our parentals? IR and I started packing up the collection of stuff that the room had gained in the past 5 weeks. (Fortunately, I had brought a bunch of empty bags, and that over the previous weekend I had started sending loaned stuff back to owners and carting stuff back to our home.) I called my mom, who was very worried that our OB was at another delivery; I explained that the babies are on the way now, but it is not an immediate emergency. (Funny, I used to think “emergency” meant “right now! Stat! Move it people!”…But now I see that there can be a couple of hours of waiting. Which makes sense, because I’ve waited for a couple of hours in the emergency room while bleeding.) MBH called the in-laws, and they said, “We’re on our way.”

I am very grateful that IR was there to transport all of our stuff & junk to our future post-op room. That was the last we saw of her….

short story “sunday” installment 5

“The Heyday of the Blood” by Dorothy Canfield Fisher
About a boy’s trip to the fair with his great-grandfather. A happy story.
best line: “He took me by the collar, and, executing a shuffling fandango of triumph, he pushed me ahead of him…”

Worst part of being a parent

The driving. My babies little heads fall forward onto their chests when we go uphill. It looks horrible. We found a solution, (well, besides duct-tape); I squeeze myself between the two car seats and can keep their heads propped up. It was uncomfortable, but I was very relieved to know that they do not have to deal with floppy head.

Great Pets

We were a bit concerned how the kitties would react with the little humans. So far, they have been great. They sometimes cautiously approach, always with adult-human supervision, and sniff for a few moments before moving on.

It seems to me that Oliver wants to make them feel welcome. He brought a scrunchie, one of his favorite toys, and dropped it in the co-sleeper. And also he brought Owlie (his stuffed owl buddy) and brought it to the door of the bedroom.

We feel a little bad about not letting the kitties sleep in the bedroom with us, where they have for the last 2 – 3 years. And we have been giving them less attention these days. We hope they still love us.

Kill your television

Now I know, that one shouldn’t watch the local news. But, when one is confined to hospital bed rest, sometimes the best intentions go awry.

The other day, we saw a news story about a new service that can help reduce waste. All of your mail goes to them, they scan it, send you an email, you respond with what you want to keep, and they recycle the rest. Excuse me; my city is one of the better ones at recycling? Who is this service for? Is this news?

I ranted to a friend, who told me what a Video News Release is…a company sends a clip to the media, and they pass it off as a news story. Hmmm…seems kinda like prime time free advertising. Read more here.

I really rate the VNR as only slightly better / more important than celebrities behaving badly. Seriously, is there no real news?

Like, how the heck did my state legislator, or mayor, or Congress decide today to spend my tax dollars? Is there a nearby state university that puts out world-class research on a daily basis? How about interviewing the researchers, whom I suppose might have a bit of their salary paid for by my taxes, and they can explain what they did, and why it’s important.

Who do you trust?

I don’t have much energy these days, so I may have to go on reputation when deciding which of two experts to believe on conflicting views of an issue.

For instance Penn & Teller are very talented entertainers, and world-class comedians who state that:
Recycling is bull-shit
Gun Control is bull-shit

However, the Economist, a liberal (read “kinda libertarian”) London-based, world-class weekly news journal believes that:
Recycling “If done right, there is no doubt that recycling saves energy and raw materials, and reduces pollution.”

Regarding Gun Control: “When it comes to most dangerous products—be they drugs, cigarettes or fast cars—this newspaper advocates a more liberal approach than the American government does. But when it comes to handguns, automatic weapons and other things specifically designed to kill people, we believe control is necessary, not least because the failure to deal with such violent devices often means that other freedoms must be curtailed.”

So, who do you trust?

I feel ripped off

You know, when my better half got preggers, I thought that I would get the pleasure of having to go to the store at 3AM for “pickled-herring and pistachio-frozen-soy-cream”. No such luck. No strange food cravings.

And another thing…people were all like “the first poo (Meconium) is vile and tar like and impossible to get off the baby”. Whatever. Have these people never played with actual tar? It was not like tar.

Things I’ve learned

I knew that we would be changing a lot of diapers…I just never wondered if my trash can could hold them all. We may have to upgrade to a larger landfill receptacle. I don’t think once in all the baby books & classes anyone mentioned that I may need a bigger trash can.

And, just talking to my sister about this, out where she lives, they don’t have trash service. They burn their garbage. Weird.

Hillary – not my choice

I gotta say, when you have reached a certain level of success in the world, you can be known by your first name. Like Tiger, or Oprah, or Elvis. Ms Hillary Clinton has achieved that. Nonetheless, she ain’t got my vote.

Granted, I ain’t watching the political races too much right now. My plate is kinda full of poopy diapers. Which if you think of it, is kinda what the candidates are offering us. But Hillary loses my vote because of her Soprano’s spoof video, done I’m sure all in good fun.

First, she wants to be like a crime boss? Is that good symbolism? Tony Soprano is a criminal, murdering, violent man who cheats on his wife, and kills family members. That’s who she wants to identify with?

Second, she has Celine Dion’s “You and I” as the campaign’s official theme song. Ms Dion is Canadian!! There were no American singers available? And it was chosen by a web-contest? What this tells me is that Hillary wants to be popular. A theme song is supposed to inspire, to let us know what you believe in. Hillary tells me that she wants a popular song, and that she doesn’t have enough confidence to voice an opinion on a song she likes.

A better choice: “Respect”. Picture this, the song plays, the crowd is fired up, Hillary enters and starts with, “For too long, the American people have been lied to…for too long, politicians think they know better than you do…. I want to tell them something, I respect the American people, and I trust them more than I trust the politicians.” OK, that won’t work, because first…it reminds us about Bill lying to us about Monica. Also, I don’t think she trusts us, I think she has more government programs designed to help protect us from ourselves.

For another reason not to vote for her, please see our good friend Newscat