Problems with vampires

Problems with vampires

Spoiler alert.

So, in my last post I ranted about humans not seeing the danger of vampires. I gave no spoiler alerts, because the info presented was from previous seasons.

Spoilers on.
Poor strategery. OK firstly, Vampire Bill kidnaps and coerces a scientist to synthesize fairy blood. Really? First, why not just glamor the scientist into wanting to help you, play to his vanity, and then tell him the whole problem. Secondly, keeping secrets from scientists is not the best way to get them to solve a problem. Thirdly, then he can stay at his lab, have his staff help, be focused on the problem. I sometimes doubt these vampires are smart enough to stay out of the sun.

Poor science writing in the show. The scientist explains to Bill that the fey-blood is magical and disintegrates quickly into normal. Then starts listing elements and compounds that are in it…aka somebody at HBO googled “science vocabulary words”. I hate it when writers try to explain the magic. Take a lesson from the classic “Back to the Future” call it a FlexCapacitor and get on with the story. Don’t waste precious time spewing gobbely-gook. Also, if it decays in seconds, then how do you know what’s in it! And finally, if it’s magic, your science instruments will not be able to detect it, scientists don’t say “magic” they say “that’s peculiar, my instruments might not be properly calibrated.”

Strategery problems – Agriculture. OK, vampires view humans as cattle. New twist, vampires REALLY want fairy blood. How about breeding what you need? Vampire-Bill, you already have captured four young female half-fey, keep them locked up, withdraw fey blood when needed, four seems like a decent start to a breeding population, and evidently they grow up fast. Obviously no one at HBO went to an Ag-school. Or raises chickens as I hear kids today like to do. Or think about where a hamburger comes from.

Poor strategery – war. Vampire-Eric learns that the humans now have UV-radiating bullets that hurt / damage vampires. Eric, you were a Viking, and what did Vikings wear into battle. Armor. What? Armor is heavy and will slow you down…true…but if you wear a bullet proof vest, you will still be super strong, super fast, and super dexterous. I know, body armor isn’t perfect, but greatly reduces the risk at only a minor hindrance to a vampire. While you’re at it, you know what’s scarier than an armor wearing vampire? One with a gun.

Poor strategery – war. Humans, I’m tired of you attacking the vamps at night. They rule the night. Use the sun, attack when they are sleeping and pull down their homes. ( I believe we saw this in the first season. ) And at night…hide in bunkers. Because they can use Molotov cocktails to make you flee you home. Actually, now that I think about it, it will be difficult to win this war.

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